Sexting and the torture that comes with it

joan on sex

Being yourself and telling yourself the truth are some of the must-dos in a person’s life. I have long told myself, I can’t do the sexting thing and ever since I stopped trying, I’ve felt less self-tortured in my sex life.

I totally get it when couples in long distance relationships say sexting is one of the few practices they use to stay sexually connected. I would recommend it if necessary. But to me, it always leaves me struggling with the thought of cheating on my partner, hence getting aroused and taking care of it alone without a full fleshed dick in play.

I’m not a huge fan of sex toys and I have no problem with anyone using them. But, as much as it may bring others sexual satisfaction [sometimes temporarily,] I find it depressing, miserable and quite frankly, embarrassing engaging in what I call, an artificial sex.

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My few years of dueling in the sexting world left me feeling like I wasn’t relationship worthy. This is because, I always had to make booty calls after faking an orgasm via a phone or computer. Why go through such torture? Why can’t you just stop fooling yourself? I used to ask myself.

Sexting is great, maybe if you completely understand how it makes you feel or how it gets you sexually satisfied [keyword, satisfied] I don’t get satisfied! I hardly experience orgasm with a real life penis moving in and out of me, talk less getting it through an electronic device by just fantasizing sex with a man who is hundreds/thousands of miles away. How depressing.

Sexting always leaves me feeling even hornier, dry, sex starved or lonely. I feel worse than I was before the experience. Sometimes, I end up crying and blaming myself for not having [real] sex whenever I want it and with whomever I want. Other days, I make the wrong decisions like, having to have sex with a moron.

Just because I am a sexually vibrant human being, sexting has never worked for me. Flirting with a guy via phone or laptop is ok but once “show me what you’re wearing in bed,” “show me your nipples”, “babe, move the camera north,” “touch it for me” or “show me your clitts” enters the conversation, I die inside.

ALSO READ: What Exactly is called an Old Pussy?


Touching myself while thinking I’m been touched by someone else [in my head]. Exchanging sexual texts and procedures with a partner via an electronic device or being controlled by my caller/chat mate to insert fingers or toys into my vagina is emotionally exhausting. It leaves my heart beating too fast, I experience heavy breathes and sometimes, leaves me feeling bored or even wanting. Why am I doing this?  Do I feel satisfied sexually? Is this ok for me? These are questions I don’t get to answer later.

So, I had to tell myself the truth… get a real dick or you don’t pursue a horny urge. Kill it! Read a book, watch a movie or call a good friend and have a lovely conversation while sipping a good glass of whisky. I can’t kill myself just because I want to have sex. If it gets so bad [for me who is single], make a damn booty call! No one would judge you for that, so just do it!

I really don’t want to get into how vulnerable it leaves its victims. Your privacy is never so private on an electronic device!

WATCH your favorite singer, Tzy Panchak reveal his best sex position below:


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  1. Palava Man

    September 16, 2019 at 3:57 pm

    Please what is an old pussy?

  2. Vivian

    September 16, 2019 at 3:59 pm

    Joan thank you for this article.
    I’ve been having the same opinion in the last 3 years and guys think I am not normal.
    Sexting only inflicts pain, leaves me more frustrated and makes me cheat often.
    No to sexting!

  3. William

    September 16, 2019 at 4:01 pm

    How do you tell couples living far apart not to sext?
    They use this to stay connected. I don’t think its a bad thing
    but I also understand what you are saying.

  4. Trouble Man

    September 16, 2019 at 4:01 pm

    Sexting is not torture. LIAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  5. Papa D

    September 16, 2019 at 4:03 pm

    What you are telling girls is that they should not send us nudes. Thank you for hating men

  6. Flashy

    September 16, 2019 at 4:04 pm

    Girls like you hate guys. Sorry to say.

  7. Larry

    September 16, 2019 at 4:05 pm

    Old pussy is what?

  8. Sally

    September 16, 2019 at 4:06 pm

    Why girls dem di fear small naked picture or sex so eh?
    Abeg wuna leave man!
    Make person do anyting weh ie want abeg

  9. Ebot

    September 16, 2019 at 4:55 pm

    But what is sexting?

  10. Irony

    September 16, 2019 at 4:59 pm

    I dont think sexting is bad but when abused, it becomes a weapon of mass destruction.

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